are smart is basically not smart, Halvorson
says. “It would seem to be a really wonderful
compliment. But it’s a terrible idea in isolation. Instead one should praise their effort
and persistence. These are the qualities that
really lead to success.”
THOMAS KOSA
Another reason people use to explain failure is that they didn’t know what to do.
“It’s almost never true,” Halvorson says. “If
you want to lose weight, you know what you
have to do. If you want to get along better with
your spouse, you know what you need to do.”
What happens is that we don’t take the
time to really think through what we need to
do, what steps we have to take. “We think,
‘I’ll use my willpower. I’ll just resist temptation.’ That’s a horrible strategy. It’s doomed
for failure,” Halvorson says.
Say your goal is to exercise more. You
need to define when and how and where
you’re going to do that.
Because our goals are often not really
spelled out in detail, we miss opportunities to
Connecting
Succeed is not sold at Costco, but is available at many independent bookstores.
Heidi Grant
Halvorson
act on them. We get too busy and then find
that several days have passed without us taking any action toward our goals.
Getting it right
The studies show that it isn’t that hard to
break these patterns and build up your “self-
control muscle,” Halvorson says. She says one
solution is to use “if-then” planning, and
explains how she used it to conquer her own
struggle with losing her “baby weight.”
Halvorson says she hates to exercise and
“will hate it forever.” In the past she would
promise herself to work out three times a week, but kept putting it off. Finally, she says, “I came to terms with the fact that my willpower was just not going to be up to the task of keeping me from impulsively eating or making good ecisions. So I started using if-then plans. If it is Monday, Wednesday or Friday at 9 o’clock, then I’m going to work out. If I’m hungry, then I’m going to have a vegeta- ble. And it was remarkable.” (She’s lost 50 pounds in a year.) Halvorson exudes enthusiasm not only for her own accomplishment, but for the
opportunity to share what she calls a “secret
stash of knowledge to help people figure out
what they’re doing wrong, and what they’re
doing right.” If-then planning and the other
solutions discussed in the book make an
enormous difference, she continues, and “it’s
so simple you almost think it isn’t going to
work, but it does. It’s not just me saying this;
thousands of people [have used these strate-
gies] in all kinds of scenarios, and it worked
for them.
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Costco members always save with Budget, including these valuable discounts and bene;ts:
• Save up to 20% o; every rental with BCD W852800
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• Additional driver fees are waived for Costco members
• 100% smoke-free ;eet
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